Teacher: When you yawn, your supposed to put your hand to your mouth !
Pupil: What ?, and get bitten !
Teacher: You aren't paying attention to me. Are you having trouble hearing ?
Pupil: No, teacher I'm having trouble listening !
Why were you late ?
Sorry, teacher, I overslept.
You mean you need to sleep at home too !
Teacher: Class, we will have only half a day of school this morning.
Class: Hooray
Teacher: We will have the other half this afternoon!
Teacher: That's quite a cough you have there, what are you taking for it ?
Pupil: I don't know teacher. What will you give me ?
Son: I can't go to school today.
Father: Why not ?
Son: I don't feel well
Teacher: Where don't you feel well ?
Son: In school !
Teacher: You missed school yesterday didn't you ?
Pupil: Not very much !
Father: I hear you skipped school to play football
Son: No I didn't, and I have the fish to prove it !
Pupil (on phone) : My son has a bad cold and won't be able to come to school today.
School Secretary: Who is this ?
Pupil: This is my father speaking !
Father: How do you like going to school ?
Son: The going bit is fine, as is the coming home bit too, but I'm not too keen on the time in-between !
Our teacher talks to herself does yours ?
Yes, but she does't realise it, she thinks we're actually listening !
Teacher: Why didn't you answer me ?
Pupil: I did, I shook my head
Teacher: You don't expect me to hear it rattling from here do you !
Teacher: I'd like to go through one whole day without having to tell you off.
Pupil: You have my permission !
Teacher: Will you stop looking at the clock at the wall and pay attention
Time will pass, but will you !
I didn't do my homework because I lost my memory
When did this start ?
When did what start !
The brain is a wonder ful thing
Why do you say that ?
Because it starts working the second you get up in the morning and never stops until you get asked a question in class !
When I was you age I thought nothing of walking 5 miles to school
I agree, I don't think much of it myself !
Be sure that you go straight home
I can't, I live just round the corner !
Playing truant from school is like a credit card
Fun now, pay later !
Laugh and the class laughs with you.
But you get detention alone !
Girlfriend: Will you love me when I'm old and fat and ugly?
Boyfriend: Of course I do !
السبت يوليو 04, 2009 2:45 am
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